Thursday, April 07, 2005
today had a good day at school. feeling high. after school went out with peifang. go McD eat until like 11plus then go my house. then we crap there. later 12:30 then go out. then 188 alot people liaos. the bus-stops are chaotic. all the sec 1s shouting. damn lorh. this batch of sec 1s sure don't know how to behave. blehx. then went to take 105. saw nicholas and joshua. blahx. then the nicholas asked us where to alight. -.-'' lame. lolx. then later 1plus reach stadium. bad day for the rest lahx. kao beix. then reach stadium everyone like so engrossed in their own activities lorhx. other classes like so enthu(siastic) lohx. then our class like so uncooperative like that lor. frisbee we won 2/6 then lost to 2/8. blehx. nevermind we did our best. but i don't know why. i just feel as if our class is cursed this year. last year we got champion in sec 1. this year we aren't doing that well. i was watching them play frisbee with 2/8 but it was like 2/8 scored 3. and we are still 0. but we managed to score 1. so? time's up. well, im not saying this to spite the players lahx. just feel like so bad lorhx. this is one of the worst days i ever had lahx. frisbee lost liaox we went up. then peifang told me 4/1 won pushball. then i looked over. sianx lor. their game ended liaox. then later they play with don't know which class for champion. but they lose lahx. wah laox. everything im so interested in, they results really disappoint me lohx. kaoz. damn it lah. what a bad day. then later 10 by 50m race. our class real suay lorhx. wenyi first runner but she fell then she still continued running. not blaming her. just pitying. so suay lohx. first runner fell liaox. then she had to get up and run with the pain. wah laox. i won't even care about running liaox loh. yeah, but i think wenyi was thinking about the class. good of her to do so. then i think our class last. but i think still got team spirit lahx. me watch until this part really don't feel like watching anymore of it liaox lohx. everything's so bad. class cheer no one enthu(siastic). everything like that lor. but at least got class spirit. then later me wanted see 4/1 the 10 by 50m. wah laox. they also suay lohx. second runner didn't get baton from first runner, wasted time. then third runner didn't get baton from second runner. damn it lahx. everything's going my way. then the last runner run quite fast still couldn't win lohx. what the heck lah. but things started getting better when it was girls 4 by 100m race. we came in 2nd. then later the guys i think came in 2nd too. then 4 by 400m girls came in 2nd too. and 4 by 400m boys came in first. this was the better part bahz. wah laoz. at least better than the beginning lor. beginning like shit lahz. everything going against my way. then before we went off, we took class photo lahx. then went off liaox. sianz. then later waited so long for 183. cos 105 so many people liaox. me too pissed off to get up and squeeze along. around 7:30pm reach home lohx. sianz. wanted to bathe then my mother went in. then i waited for awhile and wanted to go bathe, take my clothes liao. then my idiot father go bathe lor. kao bei lah. everyday snatch toilet with me nia. go hell lahz. cannot let me first arh. he home from 4 plus still don't wanna bathe. wait until me want go bathe then snatch with me. **** lahz. damn pissed lahz. everyday snatch toilet with me. stop it lahx. can't gimme first is it. will die arhz. not that i will die lahz. but at least da rang xiao lahz. or not when i not bathing then quickly go bathe lahz. me everytime switch on water heater liaox then go get my clothes. then you outside toilet see whether the switches on then quickly go bathe liaox. cb lah. wah laox. you think i so free is it? i your maid is it? everytime allowance so late then gimme. somemore i never complain to my mother lohx. me so good liaox. what more you want. want me die then happy is it. everyday know how to piss me off nia. last time i prefer you over mum, now you really piss me off everytime i see you. i just don't understand why things change so fast and suddenly. can't my relationship with my father improve. now, we are like loggerheads. everytime he talk to me, i don't answer. me just don't be bothered to talk to him lahz. everytime let him see result. he say so lousy. then last year i ask him if i should take up hcl. he said up to you. you want, you take. wah laox. like that also can. i know this my future lahs. but at least gimme a little moral support can? wah laoz. then that day i left my school diary on my bed, then he went into my room and opened the diary. kaox. respect my privacy lahz. you wanna get retribution when you're too old is it? then everytime me go eat, and computer is on. you go use. ok lahz. nothing wrong with that. is acceptable. but why do you need to open my files? you can't trust me is it? can't trust me just disown me all you want. do all you want with me. i really don't care. i don't mind. whatever. piss me off all you want. my education you don't care, next time results not letting you see. not even o levels. let's just carry on with our lives separately. i don't need this kind of irritating fathers. and you don't need me too. i can't help you in anything anyway. sometimes, i just feel you don't even regard me as a family member at all. everyone has took a ride on your motorbike before. at least twice. me? zero. i sprained my hand and you wanted me to take public transport. all the way from toh guan to jurong point there. can't even pity me. then me saw doctor wanna go back and do homework with my bandaged right hand. you still won't let me take your motorbike. do you think im left-handed? or you simply think i can write even easily with the bandage on my hand. i don't know what you were thinking. and anyway, at that time, it was already quite late. so dark. mum called you fetch me home, you refused. and you said that if i want faster reach home to do homework just take taxi. then why do you need a motorbike then? just take a taxi. - that's what you said. do you think i really need someone like that? everything you promised me are broken too. you gave me comfort when i was younger. now, everything totally changed. it's as if im just a tenant in this house and you're a busybody trying to spite me. i really don't like this at all. it's just so irritating. even my exam results, if you are not happy with it just say it directly. i will try my best to improve. you don't need to beat around the bush before getting to the point. you think it's fun? just stop it lah. and anyway, i don't even think you've even praised me before at all. edusave bursary. 2nd in class. 246 for psle. what's all that for? for my own sake. you don't even praise me at all. if you really thought all this was for my own good, then let me tell you this. if i were a dropout. who can't get a job. i can't support you when you're old. but if you like that, then that's nothing wrong. i don't care. just don't understand why everytime you have to anger me. until now, i don't even let you know about my tests or my marks. why must i let you know? you will only say bad things. im really sad by all those you said about me. ok. enough said about that. now is 8:56pm and i will go bathe now. no choice. bathe liaox then go eat le. haix
i failed once again @ 8:16:00 pm
