Tuesday, December 20, 2005
time passes by so fast.
it`s already 20th december.
may time please stop.
it`s 2 more days to PSLE posting results.
it`s 3 more days for 2006 sec 1s to go to their sec sch.
it`s 5 more days to christmas.
it`s 12 more days to a new year, 2006.
at least, some people might be waiting for this.
hoping for time to pass faster.
but i just ain`t.
it`s 14 more days to start of school.
and i`m not in the least bit looking forward to it.
i feel so bad. so sad. so guilty.
streaming sucks.
i wish life could return back to the old times.
when i was young, and so innocent.
when i knew nothing.
when i studied b`cos i was in a school.
when i listened to my parents.
when i didn`t need to do much decision-making.
when i didn`t need to worry about anything.
but life`s just gotta change.
and i`m not like exactly happy about this.
only, if i could have some things.
why am i and peifang posted to different classes?
and different streams.
WHY?
at least, others had their close friends with them.
but we don`t have.
those real close types i mean.
we put the same options.
but we ended in different routes.
i feel so guilty of everything.
if i didn`t put option B, she could`ve gotten in.
like how competitions are always.
bestfriends in life, but rivals in matches.
at least, i wish we could just go back to 2/5.
so what if we created trouble?
at least, we`re responsible.
we`re not like scaredy-cats.
who go round acting cool and bending rules,
then hide in fear when you`re caught.
we have the integrity.
i guess it took more than 1 and a half years for us to bond together.
but, that wait was well worth it.
to see us all united.
i won`t forget this year`s games day.
how we started by losing in everything.
but ended up winning some in the end.
actually, it`s not the point of winning.
we were best sports class in secondary 1.
but we took it for granted.
everyone was just happy.
b`cos we`re awarded that title.
but no one realised, what`s the effort put in.
this year, though we didn`t get it.
but i was glad, seeing us care for each other.
we didn`t blame anyone for losing.
instead, we`re enjoying ourselves.
actually, winning isn`t everything.
the point is effort, and team spirit.
even when you lose, a simple encouragement can just cheer you up.
but when you win, do you care so much?
you may get some words of encouragement and so on.
but you`re just happy b`cos you`ve won.
i`ve just rearranged my MSN list.
it`s just so messy.
was blog-hopping just now.
and some irritating pop-ups!
yeah.. including one porn site`s.
-.- not that i went though.
anyway, loads pon CCA during holidays.
LOL! not that i wouldn`t do that.
but, if the CCA peeps were bonded,
i guess i`d just go for every meeting without fail.
but i haven`t seen much clubs in our school where members are bonded.
not AVA, not F&V, not photography, not art, not library, not cybernauts.
i guess the most bonded ones are those in performing arts.
then followed by uniformed groups.
the rest, aren`t really bonded.
just like us.
may time just stop
i failed once again @ 3:01:00 pm