Sunday, May 07, 2006
here comes another post.
fresh from the oven.
okay...
today is pretty much boring like other sundays.
my parents are back again.
but they went out once again.
-.-
tomorrow there`s chemistry.
i just wanna say i won`t let myself down.
the economics paper marks the end of examinations.
unless you wanna count CME.
which i rather not count as a subject.
and so, i`m not sleeping on 10 may.
remember that. but i`ll be busy mugging.
anyway, i`ve just got some time to think.
and my thoughts wandered off freely.
there`s this burning question i wanna ask.
why do so many students hate studying?
i`m seriously interested in the answer.
yes! i`ve done my tys mcq.
except for 1.2 and 3.
there`s still loads to go.
but well.. i wonder if i do have a dream.
it`s strange. i seriously don`t particularly enjoy anything.
now, i only know that chemistry and economics rock!
i don`t even give a damn to what`s happening.
my world seems to only revolve these 2 subjects.
do i really have a long term dream?
one which i`ll work hard towards for?
for now, i only have a short-term goal.
i wanna get into ACJC.
but i know it`s not all that i want.
however, i can`t find out what i really want.
what`s my dream? what`s my ambition?
i have no idea. i don`t know.
sometimes i feel that i`m too caught up to think of such matters.
but, how am i gonna ever succeed when i don`t have a dream?
this is just so ridiculous. i live each day as it comes and goes.
i don`t know why i`m living.
i don`t know what i`m studying for.
i don`t know what i`m working towards for.
perhaps, it`s time i take this into serious consideration.
fickle-minded. yes, that`s how i am.
from my dream of entering SP`s media design to ACJC.
what will be next? who knows? there`s still 1 more year at least.
and my room`s still in a total mess.
due to the examinations.
all revision materials are just piled on top of each other.
sometimes, i wish my room wasn`t so crammed.
with big cabinets, big beds, big tables, sewing machine and ironing board.
well, that sewing machine is as well as spoilt.
it`s lost its value. it`s of no use.
but i`ve no idea what`s it doing in my room.
3 quarters of my table are piled with books, school stuffs.
i`ve only like one sixth of it left for space to revise.
yes, that`s why i can`t concentrate.
all these things are just distracting me.
HAHA! i remember this joke.
it happened last year in the school`s lift.
and mrs yeo asked me what`s my CCA.
my answer was still changing.
then she asked is there such a CCA?
well... it ain`t that funny.
but i think i should start greeting all the teachers.
i actually had this habit earlier part of this year.
and the examinations neared, so i kicked off this habit.
now, i`m like see which teacher, shuang then greet.
oh yes.
great. ros probably gonna scold when she comes back.
the class standard`s been dropping ever since she left.
i feel so guilty. we`re taking teo for advantage.
maybe... maybe.
we shouldn`t get relief teachers in the first place.
when david relieved for CME, he didn`t teach much.
again, we took him for granted.
actually, i feel we`re all too evil.
is that the only solution for us?
i doubt that`s the only way out.
we just need to think more.
anyway..
enough of reflecting.
i`ve rested enough.
now, get back to e maths papers 2!
and at night, shall revert to chemistry once again.
most is 2h sleep for me tonight.
i failed once again @ 5:32:00 pm
